Elllooooo!! It's been awhile!!
LOL i looked at my last post and WOOOWWW did it sound depressing!! I should explain it abit actually... Last yr October, i started back at uni, my final year of studies and this was one of my biggest fears because i have never done it before... for 5 years, i have feared this moment in my life because in my degree, 3rd year is the only year that actually counts towards what up end up with as your final grade... I have always been an AIM HIGH or don't do it at all sort of person.. If i know i cannot achieve something to the best because i am not ready or prepared for it, then i would rather not begin and feel like a failure.. yep, typical perfectionist!! :/
So in October 2013, i had just finished backpacking Asia and i had to start writing my dissertation... Academic writing is not something i am naturally good at because i am dyslexic, my thoughts aren't easily translated onto paper if i can't write the way i think. Like it would take me a whole paragraph or two to get my point across but it should have only taken 1 or 2 sentences. I was pretty down and depressed about this piece of writing because i had decided to choose a subject i have a passion for- homelessness.. but as a design project and area to write about, it is so incredibly complex and challenging that my tutor told me that i have probably picked one of the hardest things to do.. Which obviously made me panic and worry.. :( I handed in my draft late and when i did hand it in, she was actually concerned... My problem was that i got too emotionally attached to the homeless, i wasn't being objective enough.. I remember feeling like quitting, giving up, pushing people away and i even fell out with my best friend because i didn't need another person telling me why i handed my work late when i already felt like crap!
However i didn't give up, i had minimal support from my mentor and my sister and managed to write a very good dissertation. Surprisingly, i got an A- for it! :D probably my proudest achievement in academia.. since i consider writing my biggest flaw!
Along with the essay, i had to start the design project at the same time, my product had to answer my hypothesis form my dissertation so again- it was a product designed for the homeless.. fast forward to February 2014 for me... :p This was also the most difficult project i have ever done in my life. I had to learn skills i never had before and i was told that it was nearly impossible and unlikely that i could finish this project in a well finished and complete final product... Sweat and tears and alot of panic and all-nighters later, i handed in, presented my work and i ended up also getting an amazing grade for that project!! I was so surprised and unbelievably HAPPPYYYY!!!
I now an at the last leg of my degree.. the client project.. I have about a month and a half left to finish it... and just looking back at my journey- the highs and the ridiculous amount of lows... it does give me some confidence that i can overcome my struggles now with my current work.. I have realllly struggled with this one because its not only the work, but the people around me that has affected how i have performed... :( I'm the kinda of person who doesn't like to be hated on or upset people and not care.. i care abit too much... and one of my friends at uni was envious of my grades that he showed it and it bugged me.. made me lose motivation to go into class, and avoid talking to people incase i got more haters.. I'm kinda over it now.. as i did have 1 good friend who has been supportive in my class.. and i think you either don't need anyone to do that and be even more driven on your own goals, or just that one person who believes in you is enough :)
People do describe me as/get the impression that i am very driven and I've got thing under control.. and it is flattering but definitely not always the case... I have terrible management skills, I'm also pretty unreliable and flaky!! But i can be very very driven... I feel like i am more so now than i was 3 hours ago just because i am reflecting back onto my original purpose for doing it and what it can lead to contributing towards my dreams.. Maybe take a moment to pause and think about your dreams.. your purpose and the times you struggled like i did, but got back up and exceeded everyone's expectations.
'Nothing you do is impossible...The very word itself tells you that "I'm-Possible"
Love snow x
LOL i looked at my last post and WOOOWWW did it sound depressing!! I should explain it abit actually... Last yr October, i started back at uni, my final year of studies and this was one of my biggest fears because i have never done it before... for 5 years, i have feared this moment in my life because in my degree, 3rd year is the only year that actually counts towards what up end up with as your final grade... I have always been an AIM HIGH or don't do it at all sort of person.. If i know i cannot achieve something to the best because i am not ready or prepared for it, then i would rather not begin and feel like a failure.. yep, typical perfectionist!! :/
So in October 2013, i had just finished backpacking Asia and i had to start writing my dissertation... Academic writing is not something i am naturally good at because i am dyslexic, my thoughts aren't easily translated onto paper if i can't write the way i think. Like it would take me a whole paragraph or two to get my point across but it should have only taken 1 or 2 sentences. I was pretty down and depressed about this piece of writing because i had decided to choose a subject i have a passion for- homelessness.. but as a design project and area to write about, it is so incredibly complex and challenging that my tutor told me that i have probably picked one of the hardest things to do.. Which obviously made me panic and worry.. :( I handed in my draft late and when i did hand it in, she was actually concerned... My problem was that i got too emotionally attached to the homeless, i wasn't being objective enough.. I remember feeling like quitting, giving up, pushing people away and i even fell out with my best friend because i didn't need another person telling me why i handed my work late when i already felt like crap!
However i didn't give up, i had minimal support from my mentor and my sister and managed to write a very good dissertation. Surprisingly, i got an A- for it! :D probably my proudest achievement in academia.. since i consider writing my biggest flaw!
Along with the essay, i had to start the design project at the same time, my product had to answer my hypothesis form my dissertation so again- it was a product designed for the homeless.. fast forward to February 2014 for me... :p This was also the most difficult project i have ever done in my life. I had to learn skills i never had before and i was told that it was nearly impossible and unlikely that i could finish this project in a well finished and complete final product... Sweat and tears and alot of panic and all-nighters later, i handed in, presented my work and i ended up also getting an amazing grade for that project!! I was so surprised and unbelievably HAPPPYYYY!!!
I now an at the last leg of my degree.. the client project.. I have about a month and a half left to finish it... and just looking back at my journey- the highs and the ridiculous amount of lows... it does give me some confidence that i can overcome my struggles now with my current work.. I have realllly struggled with this one because its not only the work, but the people around me that has affected how i have performed... :( I'm the kinda of person who doesn't like to be hated on or upset people and not care.. i care abit too much... and one of my friends at uni was envious of my grades that he showed it and it bugged me.. made me lose motivation to go into class, and avoid talking to people incase i got more haters.. I'm kinda over it now.. as i did have 1 good friend who has been supportive in my class.. and i think you either don't need anyone to do that and be even more driven on your own goals, or just that one person who believes in you is enough :)
People do describe me as/get the impression that i am very driven and I've got thing under control.. and it is flattering but definitely not always the case... I have terrible management skills, I'm also pretty unreliable and flaky!! But i can be very very driven... I feel like i am more so now than i was 3 hours ago just because i am reflecting back onto my original purpose for doing it and what it can lead to contributing towards my dreams.. Maybe take a moment to pause and think about your dreams.. your purpose and the times you struggled like i did, but got back up and exceeded everyone's expectations.
'Nothing you do is impossible...The very word itself tells you that "I'm-Possible"
Love snow x
