Teaching Nishy how to blog!

My student Rock lee Nishy and me as his teacher Guy sensei! :D

Hey everyone!! So i'm at a cafe with my friend NISHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! :D and he has asked for a favour to teach him how to blog... He said that he has a lot of things to share with the world and reckons blogging is a good platform to begin with!! I ( of course) agree because thats how i started! :D so without further all do.. this is the first example to show him! I not only teach this guy how to blog, i am very wise haha! I teach him how to read the signs of flirting (men and women!), how to get out of an arranged marriage and what food is the most tastiest in the world!
:D Great teacher i know! :p lol!

Contentment in Relationships ...

A long time ago, someone told me that the way they see relationships is that both persons within it has to be content and committed to actually make it work and go the whole mile to 'happily ever after'... That is why even though he had been with his partner for 5 years, he was still open to the fact that if either of them ever felt differently and that if his partner had gotten to know someone in her life that gave her more out of her life, he would be open and accepting to let her go because her happiness was important than to force something that was no longer working... 

I remember hearing this and feeling quite objective about it... because it was a long time they had been together and he didn't plan on getting married to her (he was one that felt marriage had become obsolete...) because he had it in his mind that people constantly change and nothing lasts forever... I felt alittle sad upon hearing this but gradually understood what he meant... It's quite hard balancing the needs of others and your own needs... do you give up the love of your life for their happiness (wether it be career, different life path or the fact that they've met someone else) or do you fight for what you had..that you spent so much time in your life building and because you expect those 5 years to count for something??!

What do you do if you want to be happy and you want them to be happy but that happiness no longer resides between both of you the way it used to??

Honestly... I used to think otherwise but i do believe you should put the other persons happiness first... To know your own self worth, is knowing you deserve someone that would do the same for you...Lets not even bring in the beautiful couples who keep their vows and would never dream to end their relationship, i'm talking about the bf or gf or bestfriend or family member that would drop you like its hot because their aren't happy or content anymore... Even if it means going through a heartache trying to kill off all those dreams and plans you made for your future...can it honestly be better staying with someone who is no longer content in your relationship? 

I'm all for looking on the brighter side of things but a fact of life is, nothings lasts forever...people get old and will eventually die, friends lose contact with eachother...feelings water down and pain does end... The only thing i know that is forever is God's love for us... That in itself is enough for me because i've learnt to understand that now... I honestly let my heart break for every bad thing that happened in the world...like i was never content with what i could do to help... (stupid big ass heart of mines!! >_<)

I'm really at peace with that idea now... that i'd actually be ok if people that i've built a bond or relationship with for many years decide to drift away or take a different path to mines if it means them gaining more happiness than they had when they had me in it... I'm also open to the fact that same way nothing lasts forever (i'd obviously try harder if i was married because divorces is not in my cards), that they might not feel like that forever and nor will i... friends can reunite and couples can get back together because the same way life experiences teaches us stuff, time allows us to heal and grow...we ourselves mold and change into better (well or worst if you didn't grasp the lesson your mistakes thought you!) people... I believe we can all find contentment... with ourselves, our friends, familys and partners... just that we can and we wil find them quite alot of times in our lives... just allow whatever needs to happen..happen... you most certainly gain alot of clarity from doing that at the very least!!

(yea i just wrote loads and loads again...i do wonder who reads my thoughts... O_o)

a random but had-to-put-it-out-there kinda post! :)

I took in a stranger...

So here alil story i wasn't gonna share but a friend suggested i should share it on my blog.. It might be an inspiration... It might not, some might think i took a risk and i shouldn't tell others about it (guess you gotta trust your gut instincts guys and dolliez) .. but all i can say is this is me, everyone does things to their own feelings in their heart.. this was mines...

A stranger is defined as someone i don't know more than a conversation in less than an hour... Last sunday, i had just finished attending my 2nd church service for the day, i went to socialise with a friend after where other people from church hung out for abit before going home... and i met a tiny girl with her life in her backpack and a huge ass suitcase to go with it... she just wondered into the service by accident and ended up being invited to socialise by my friend funny enough... Shes a complete stranger to London, shes a 22 yr old Korean girl travelling alone for a few weeks in europe and she told me she was flying back to Seoul this evening..being in London for just 4 days, she was tired... I got to know her story abit but then she had to leave to catch her train to heathrow airport so we all said our goodbyes and wished her a safe journey home... 

As i walked back to my bike to cycle home, me and my friend bumped into her outside the train station looking frazzled because she had got the information wrong and had missed her flight for the night... she needed to stay another night and i guess my heart went out to her.. i though she was very brave to travel all alone to a strange part of the world ( i asked her if she had seen the movie TAKEN lol..because that movie made me cautious to go solo in my travels..and she did see it aswell, thats why she was scared in Paris lol!) and in the end, i offered her a place to stay with me for her last night... All the others around lived very far from central London and i only lived 10mins away... so i told her i'd cycle home, get my car and drive back to pick her up..i did exactly that and just looked after her so she would know that she is safe with me...

(Shes super shy so she'd kill me if she knew i put up this pic, but i said the same if u showed my pic to anyone aswell so we are even! :p)

I've never actually done something like this before but i knew i wanted to help and trusted God that i was doing the right thing... I really enjoyed getting to know her alittle better whiles i served up some good ol vietnamese food for her whiles i mustered whatever that i could that was vegan for myself, i was starvingggg loool!! After a shower and a good nights rest, i gave her a fresh pair of socks and offered my trainers (because hers were so battered :s but she didn't take it) we went out to have breakfast in starbuck ( i couldn't eat any of the cakes she bought :'( ) before dropping her to the station for her journey home... I think i made a new lil sister in christ friend from Korean... Anyways i do wish the best for her and i just wanted her to have at least one genuine experience that didn't leave her losing faith in humanity and fellowship :)

I know exactly how it feels to have lost everything important in your life.. to feel betrayed, lost and alone in this world... but i also know that you don't need alot to be happy... Like i've said before, i've learnt to live with very little through my past experiences and i've experiences real compassion by others towards me... I've been saved and i am loved by God so if i can put others before myself, i'm not really putting myself 2nd place either... He never comes 2nd for putting other people 1st...I will never come 2nd for putting others 1st..because I put you first Jesus...I love you..

Say Goodbye to Old ties...

I've recently had alot on my mind about old ties, friendships and relationships...and how they have affected the way we are to this present day... I take holy communion every month at my church as a sacrament the lord has asked of us to do so in rememberance of him... We usually confess and ask for forgiveness before we take holy communion and everytime i would ask for the forgiveness of my sins, the forgiveness of sins of others and the strength to forgive others that have wronged me that i still find hard to forgive... I don't know why...as much as i try to not let the wrongs of other towards me get at me...well dammit it does and it does take me awhile to really forgive and not feel emotions that would say otherwise... 

Someone told me that it is ok not to forget what these people have done to me...rather than hold pain/grudges towards them...squash it and let it go...and really by trying to not forget, reminding yourself to forgive and remember what they did...well..u eventually forget with no negative feelings attached.... I for one have definately let the people who have hurt me-hurt me more simply by ignoring the problem and when those people float back up in my life...the associated hurt comes back...and what can u do but be back in that place right??? which is whyyyy.... *drum roll* to say goodbye to old ties is the remember and think of them...let out the hurt and anger...and then say 'i forgive you' in your heart... As much days as it takes till it really is goodbye mentally, emotionally and physically..(well u probably wouldn't care so much even if u bumped into them if you've gotten to that point!!) Some people are able to remain friends after true forgiveness...depending on the situations of course..and some simply can't because we don't forget dispite the freedom of forgiveness...

just thought i'd share a mind note worth pondering on... what do you think guys and dollies??

The Melon Grape experiment..

For the longest time I have been calling my Helen a Melon..it just makes sense till she's started calling me a Grape O_o and somehow the nicknames stuck and yet it only makes me think of her with a big head and me with a ridiculously small head!! O_o"

Anyways last week I went for lunch my Melon and we had Mexican food down bricklane..it was lovely!! And we had alot of fun messing around with the hats, going behind the bar and shakin it up abit before our food came!! Was good time when we lived together and we certainly did have alot of fun thinking back to the antics we got up to with drunk Colleen!! Lol! This girl used to girlfy me...she stopped me hanging out with the home boys for awhile so I'd come back to wearing skirts haha!!

Anyways this was just a short post to clink wine glasses with eye contact to you melanious!! I hope you have a wonderful birthday this week in Alanya with your family!! I'll see you when you get back!!! xxx

Bulgogi baby!!

 

Next to Kim-chi, Bulgogi is actually koreas national dish and one of my favourites aswell!! This day was so funny, I had to meet my Dhara chan but her battery died so finding her in picadilly was mad! So much so I asked a clown if he had seen her and to my surprise!! The clown knew all about Dhara chan!! It means she was the type of girl to stand around and tell a clown of her life story and be totally cool about it lol!! He even knew how we met and my name!! O_o creepy!! 

Anyways me and dhara chan had Bulgogi for lunch..it was a.m.a.z.i.n.g!! I love and miss this girl...so much stupidness when I'm around her...basically my inner child and high pitched voice synchronises with hers whenever we get too close together lol...it's so true it's abit scary O_o"

Missing you Tara

I just got my iPhone back from my boss and just went through my pictures...loads of when I went to Barbados and spent just over half a month with Tara...I don't miss the Mosquitos who love my blood but I do miss this girl!! <3

My Bestfriend is better than your Bestfriend!!!

When we were about 17yrs old!!

Hahahahhahahaaa, what a title right?? we'll... it's kinda true!! Lemme explain...

1stly, i kinda don't believe in bestfriends anymore..yet somehow, i sorta have one!! A long time ago i used to try to find the perfect friendship in another girl... I used to treat my 'bestfriend' like family yet what had always happened was that i would get hurt that they don't value me the way i value them, i'd get hurt if she doesn't come to my birthday celebration or something stupid like that... Sorta like a relationship actually where you expect too much... It's happened too many times for me to sit back and think ' oh i'll just find someone else to replace you' i gave up on the whole idea of a bestfriend all together... It's hard enough trying to have a relationship and make time for a partner, why would you want to create more expectations and obligations to a friend??

My 22nd bday treat from her..

The way i see my relationship with my bestfriend is sorta the way i want my future relationship to be with my husband... Where we support and help eachother, don't constantly have to see eachother to function...I don't expect anything from her, i accept the good and the flaws in her... and whenever we do get together, its amazing and we always have a good time even just washing up the dishes together in church!!

Our random drive to brighton beach with senia

Jessy has always been there for me and i never knew it!! When i had problems with 'friends that were suppose to be my closest ones' from school and when my supposed bestfriend didn't apprieciate my support.. she was always there to give me advice, she was a great friend and all in all, i didn't realise that we were so simular and shared alot of the same beliefs, we both kicked ASS in college with me getting top grades and her coming 2nd :D  WE didn't hang out or meet up too often but when we did, it was like just yesterday we saw eachother, no chemistry lost! So both of us thought if we were to have a bestfriend..surely it would be someone you turn to and feel comfort and support from without the expectation of anything in return... so there you go.. thats how i found my bestfriend!! :D and she is super awesomeness!!

oh but we both think our younger sisters are our bestfriends...we grew up with them...pretty cool how similar we are! i love it!! lol!

We did it Friends style and i messed about in a wedding gown with her lol!!

The reason for this post is because i'm just so proud of her! She's achieved a top grade for her degree as a interior designer and shes getting married next year to the love of her life!! i'm so happy for her!! I get to be a bridesmaid and it's just gonna be exciting to be apart of the biggest celebration of her life...

Oh yea, i found an awesome blog for wedding inspirations...might help you cut the costs alil bit :)

Click Here for The Wedding Blog Jess!!

Jess if you're reading this... One day when i'm as lucky as you....you plan my wedding, u'd be better prepared the 2nd time round :D xxx

Alton Towers with the best gang of friends...

I love theme parks!! And in ever town and country i go to, i can almost guarantee that i would have fun at a theme park because it was something i was deprived of as a child... My parents weren't very rich, and seeing as there are 4 of us, it would cost alot to take us to a theme park as a family!!

I remember one time all my cousins and our parents drove to windsor to Legoland... When my parents saw the entrance prices, they turned back and took us home whiles some of our cousins got to go regardless... I've never blamed them for it, i understand even more as i got older...money was tight...

The happiest memories of going on rides was when we all got abit taller and got wristbands for the amusement park in Southend beachfront...Those were my 1st memories of rollercoasters and probably awoken the adrenaline junkie in me! :) Oh and funfairs were things i looked forward to as a kid too!! but like i said, we never got to go on the rides as kids, my to be in the environment was a treat in itself!!

moving on...lol!! I went to Alton towers for the 1st time in my life recently and it was A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!!! :D

Probably about 13-14 i went to Chessington, Thorpe park for the 1st times and ever since them, had been many more times because u can take train there..as i got older, car rides there with my cousins and friends... I'm 23 now.. and this time, me and my Topshop friend drove to Alton Towers.. A whooping 140 odd miles away from london!!! And oh yea... I was 1 of the 2 drivers delivering the group there!!

I had an awesome time!! It was actually suppose to be really bad rainy weather that day... but no it didn't hit us when we were there, it hit London hahahahahhaa!!! We had beautiful warm sunny weather!! and we all had sooo much fun!!! I went with the funniest group of friends i had made whiles my time in Topshop Oxford circus!! We all had nicknames too!!haha!

(Left to right) Des(only one without a nickname!);gingey/cookie aka Lyn; Jafar aka Mustafa, Triads GF aka Me O_o; Baloo aka Shaz; Elf aka jenny, Immigrant aka Julien and Meerkat aka Nikeel!!! :D 

I had so much fun! Love these guys!!

Living with a friend..

Guys this is embarrassing...but I have never lived with anyone before...I am 23 yrs old and I have never moved away from my moms house...to be honest, I've never had a good enough reason to... I've had to share my room with my lil sis when I was younger..that's about it..I've been on countless vacations where I've had to live in the same accommodations for a few weeks max but never for long..

I know..I have been told I don't learn real responsibility untill I have to fend or myself.. :s how is it like living on your own? Is it lonely? I like living at my home, I don't have any restrictions..I have my freedom and I can take care of my parents when they need me..

I am currently allowing one of my good friends stay with me for a few weeks untill she can find herself somewhere more permanent..it has been fun n interesting so far living with another person in my own space..I'm definately never bored! :D

Havin a fab day with my melon!

I'm currently living with one of my home boyz Melon!! We had lunch in Brixton today! I never realised my home town was so awesome!! Like we needa hang out here more often! Only thing is I have been traumatised since lil going thru brixton and getting sleazy comments whiles I walk..that sadly hasn't changed but at least I won't go here alone :D I really wanna go here to buy my vegetables n fruit on a average morning n blend in!! We at Starbuck havin a frappe on a beautiful sunny day today!! I had a soy a strawberry frappe and she had a caramel coffee frappe!

 

Some of the new friends i made this weekend. They were very nice and kind!! i did hang out with a couple from different groups but they were my main herd.. Basically i do have a group i'm normally with every weds..but non of them came to this weekend, just me..so i got merged into a younger, more my age group of people to do discussions with.. I was quite shy to everyone..didn't dance when the party started nor did i want to drink..still i enjoyed my experience there..

What kind of boat never sinks? A FRIENDshipppp :)

Haha yea I got that from 'friends' too :p

A lil montage to show the kinda random fun we had..mostly just relaxing..which is what we all needed.. Senia found a heart shaped stone n wrote out names on it..that was cute :)

Caring is taking me to shisha!

I haven't been very well..not in the best of health n I've been getting alot of people worried about me lately.. :( particularly my bestfriend.. So she came over n forced fed me! O_o she brought me a sun flower to cheer me up too..her n Senia jammed with me whiles I half played with my niece and half felt like crap..
They took me to cafe naturals, promised me the best hot chocolate and most amazing shisha.. :) oh how it did cheer me up n unlike popular beliefs..smokin shisha made me feel better lol!!

Jeniniooo at Life Drawing..

 Me and my home boys went to a life drawing class... and yea..i suck!!! i havent done life drawing since i was 17... The good old days where we used to all laugh when our model- a fat, frumpy old man dropped his pants xD hahahahha we all couldn't stop laughing because yea, we were new to it and abit immature...

Now my friends went last week and i wanted to go but i was workin late...This time i wanted to go for sure...and i was praying that we'd get a female model to draw..coz lets face it...the female body is better to draw and look at..and male..not so much... and yesss we got a female model to draw! she was very pretty!! no homo :p

 

It was quick 2min poses at 1st then gradually increased...now i personally think my drawngs suck...i loked around and there was so true talents out there :s

 

These were my 10 min sketches... which is 5 times more time i had than before yet its still sucks.. i've kinda lost my touch..which is expected since i dont draw like i used to..i don't practice...

 

We had a 15min break so we went out to get a drink n food.. n when we came bk in, some peopple were drawing already..now this was my 1st time here, and i thought i had less time to draw her so i didnt take my time..n drew her fast with charcoal...then i realised it was like a 30min pose!! n by then, i was like..GOSH DARNIT!!! i coulda taken my time n drew a very beautiful picture... so i just drew her twice, the pencil sketch i made her skinnier for some reason...looks too cartoony...i need alot of practice...the teacher gave me some very good advice and tips, he kept reassuring me that i werent that bad... haha...well..theres always room for improvement! 

Drawing was relaxing...i took my mind off everything and just drew and it was nice to stop thinking and just get lost in my sketch book and studying a naked woman hahahahaaa!!

i'm sure the boys enjoyed it more this time...they had a fat old man last time xD

New Found love for this!

Haha!! Well if I get fat next time u see me, u'll know whyyy alleee!! :D

Krispy Kremes

Jammed with my home bois yday after work.. We drove to Krispy Kremes, the huge one! N I had a glamour doughnut! It was pretty haha! It basically tasted like a ribena doughnut O_o it was ok, original was better! We jus chilled after that, watched toy story 3 again n them lot were battling it out on SF4 which was expected ay O_o

An Awesome Jamage :D

Today was my day off..and pretty much slept in all day till 6 coz I actually cotched in my car from 3am till 7am with my home gurl Ley last night jus catching up n being our mad selves when we r together..only coz we both didn't have work the nx day.. So yea, had my beauty sleep then headed out to meet the chicas for 1 awesome jamage!

This was the shizzle! We had shisha at our lil place..n I love it when we have the fruit heads instead..it really makes all the difference :)

I got too much love for my cuz! N nermz is jus awesome! Everytime we together, it is just about great convoz n jokez :)

 Met my bestie n her cuz aswell today..n I've just found new love for Senia haha!! Like minded and totally cool! I think I love everyone in jess's fam! 4real they already see me as fam, so yeaz..I'm quarter Egyptian aiteeeee!!

 had an awesome time today! I'm happy I have awesome people in my life... People change and life changes people..n I of all people know this...but u jus alway gotta remember that that's just very human to do so...I live and love on the moment..live without expecting and u'll have more smiles n peace over the dramas u could create for urself.. Like I love these people..but if anyfin changes bout that, it's cool!!! That's life n I'd accept it with the awesome memories I've gained from them :) 

Treat Yo Home Gurl

My bestie is a chocoholic..me..not so much!! And we walked past this place in south kensington n she froze n dribbled LOOOL!! So I forced her to a treat!! Haha.. We hustled extra chocolate n raspberries :D it was so gooood..even for me- not a big sweet tooth chick!!

Light Painting

Jeniniooooo.. This took 30secs!!

We decorated my baby Paris...Tried to do sumfin like the Clio advert i think?! plz correct me :p

JENINIOOO VS GREGASAUR

JENINIOOO WINS!!! POWWW!! looool! Can you see my sword!!?!! I am just that AWESOMEEE xD hahahhahahaha